My wife Sharon and I spent several weeks in September traveling in England. Our primary purpose for going was to walk the Thames River Path, from its puddle of a source near Kemble, to the flowing river it becomes in Windsor. We followed the river over 150 miles, in 13 days. We arranged with travel company Footpath Holidays to make our overnight accommodations and transport our luggage from inn to inn along the way. The foot path took us through woods and fields and occasional charming villages. We encountered many kinds of birds (ducks, geese, and swans on the water) and domestic animals including cows, horses, goats, and sheep, including black sheep. That reminded me of an epithet we once used, which would be considered racist today: “He is the black sheep of the family,” which I often was.
I feel kind of proud at age 79 to have walked the 150-mile Thames path, especially after having had a stroke a couple of years ago. But I am even more proud of Sharon doing it at age 83.
Speaking of our age difference, Sharon had a wonderful article published last year in the NY Times section called “Tiny Love Stories:”
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/04/style/tiny-modern-love-stories-i-worried-about-telling-him-my-age.html
I feel kind of proud at age 79 to have walked the 150-mile Thames path, especially after having had a stroke a couple of years ago. But I am even more proud of Sharon doing it at age 83.
Speaking of our age difference, Sharon had a wonderful article published last year in the NY Times section called “Tiny Love Stories:”
https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/04/style/tiny-modern-love-stories-i-worried-about-telling-him-my-age.html
Our Ages Added Up Perfectly
In 1990, I joined Herb’s campaign for South Carolina governor. Herb wanted to overturn the provision in the state constitution that prohibited atheists from holding public office. We met in person, then fell in love via phone and letter during the summer. I worried about telling him my age. When he asked, I said, “Fifty-two. And you?” “Forty-eight.” We lost the election but helped to overturn the law. After we wed, I asked, “What did you think when I told you my age?” He said, “I thought 52 and 48 make 100.” Did I mention he was a mathematics professor? — Sharon Fratepietro
We lived together for ten years before getting married at 12:01 a.m. on Jan 1, 2000.
While in England, Sharon and I spent an extra day in Oxford during our Thames walk. We saw interesting sites, but mainly I wanted to re-visit the Oxford Union at Oxford University, the most famous debating society in the world. I took part in a debate there in 2005. The topic of the debate about was whether or not American religion undermines American values. My opponents were Rich Lowry, (editor of National Review), Eric Metaxes, and Joe Loconte. On my side, Michael Lind cancelled at the last minute, leaving Welton Gaddy, who was president of the national Interfaith Alliance, and me. And each side included an Oxford student.
The age-old format at the Oxford Union is highly formal and ritualized. Debaters wear tuxedos. I rented one for the occasion and have never worn a tuxedo before or since that debate, except for my tuxedo T-shirt (see wedding photo above).
I followed Rich Lowry in the debate. My opening line made even Lowry laugh: “You just heard Richard Lowry complain about what it’s like to be a conservative in New York City. Now I’ll tell you what it’s like to be an atheist in South Carolina.” I then described some of my experiences, including my run for governor to help overturn the provision in the South Carolina Constitution that prohibited atheists from holding public office.
I further illustrated how American values were being undermined by American religion, describing my experience at my local city council meeting in Charleston. Meetings start with a religious invocation by one of the members, usually a Christian. At my request, one council member invited me to give a secular invocation. But as I got up to speak, half the council members walked out because they knew I was an atheist. They didn’t return until it was time for the Pledge of Allegiance, and they turned to me as they recited the words “under God.”
I then gave in my Oxford debate the “dreaded” invocation that several council members refused to hear. My invocation promoted American values.
Thank you for this opportun
ity to “invoke” a minority point of view. Each of us is a minority in some way. It might be race, religion, sexual orientation, nationality, or however else we may be regarded as different. Each of us is also part of some majority. It is when we wear our majority hats that we need to be most mindful of how we treat others. We must pledge our best efforts to help one another, and to defend the rights of all our citizens and residents.
What divides us is not so much our religious differences in this diverse country, but the degree of commitment we have to equal freedom of conscience for all people. We are gathered today, both religious and secular members of our community, with the shared belief that we must treat our fellow human beings with respect and dignity.
In this invocation, I don’t ask you to bow your heads, but to look up at what you can accomplish by applying your talents and experience to the issues that confront us. I don’t ask you to close your eyes, but to keep your eyes open to the serious problems that city government can solve or improve. As you work together on behalf of all who live in this city, may you draw strength and sustenance from one another through reason and compassion.
I closed my invocation in a bipartisan manner by quoting from two American presidents I greatly admire —one a Republican and the other a Democrat.
First, the Republican: “When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad. That is my religion.” Abraham Lincoln
Then, the Democrat: “It’s remarkable how much you can accomplish if you don’t care who gets the credit.” Harry S. Truman
During the Oxford debate, an audience member asked, “Isn’t the “Creator” mentioned in the U.S. Constitution?” My response: “No, not in the Constitution. It is mentioned in the Declaration of Independence, which is not a governing document but a call for rebellion against the British Crown. The Declaration refers to a Creator endowing people with inalienable rights, which distinguishes Americans from an empire that asserted the divine right of kings.”
I also said: “In the melting pot called America, we are one nation under the Constitution (or maybe under Canada), but not one nation under God. In fact, given how the religious right opposes the teaching of evolution, or any scientific or social view that conflicts with a literal interpretation of the Bible, we are really becoming one nation under-educated.”
I closed my portion of the debate with this: “To understand the universe and solve human problems, America must be a country committed to the application of reason, science, and experience, but not religion— a country where our deeds are more important than our creeds.”
When the debate ended, the audience of students, professors, and guests voted with their feet according to which door they chose to leave the hall. Our side won the debate.
You can watch my portion of the debate on my website here. https://www.herbsilverman.com/videos.html
After walking the Thames Path, Sharon and I spent a week in London, where we visited interesting sites, went to several fine plays, and saw a terrific movie called Oliver Sacks: His Own Life. We also walked in Hyde Park to the Speakers Corner, known as the oldest free speech platform in the world, where people give arguments for their issues, and get audience reactions.
England is a fascinating and beautiful travel destination, and I will always remember our experiences there appreciatively. But the 150-mile Thames walk will be the most memorable part of the trip for Sharon and me, till death do us part—hopefully not for a long time.
